I am totally thrilled to be a UBP first timer. I'm fairly new to the blogging world and still trying to catch on to the lingo and to become more familiar. So far, I've met a lot of really nice and welcoming people here. Here's a little bit about myself...

I've been married to my high school sweetie, Hubby, for 29 years! I'm a momma to three...the oldest Bri Bri, middle kid, Cam Bam and youngest, Rai Rai, keeps life interesting. I love being an identical twin to "Neecy".

I've got a quirky, creative personality and feel like middle age is definitely the most adventurous time of my life. My blog, Love, Life and All that Jazz is my opportunity to share my joys, sorrows, challenges and accomplishments. My faith is important, as is my walk with the Lord. I'm not perfect but I'm learning as I go along.

I love life and all that it has to offer. (live, love, laugh) I hope you'll join me as I pursue my bucket list, and experience unique encounters.

I am thrilled to be a part of this party and look forward to meeting each of you and making new friends!!!

~Syrone

Five, Four, Three, Two, One...Countdown to seeing my Twin

     In 24 hours and 15 minutes, (and counting) I will be heading to Oregon where I will finally be reunited with my twin sis, Neecy. I'm giddy, excited and beside myself. Imagine that you've been working on a 1000 piece puzzle. You're about to finish when you notice that there is a piece missing. You start looking under the table, chairs, rug etc...but still can't find the missing puzzle piece.  In the meantime, you have a puzzle that you've worked on for many hours, yet with a missing piece there's no telling when or if it'll ever be finished.

     For the past several years, I have felt like an unfinished puzzle and the missing puzzle piece; my twin sister, Neecy aka Simone. When we were little, Neecy and I mapped out our futures. We would marry twins and move in together. We figured our husbands would automatically get along, especially if they were also twins. We would live and raise our children together and live happily under one roof. But, with our childlike imaginations we obviously hadn't thought things through. We hadn't considered a plan B? What if we didn't marry twins? What if we didn't share a house or even live close to one another? Even worse, what if our husbands didn't get along?

     Well, Neecy and I didn't marry twins. We didn't have the double wedding that we had planned and we certainly didn't share a house or let alone, live in the same state. But, I'm hoping that even if our husbands aren't a lot alike, they will have a mutuality...they are both madly in love with identical twins who happen to be the best of friends. Like my sister, my hubby and I are somewhat opposites. My hubby lives life on the wild and crazy side.  He is impulsive and usually will blurt out whatever comes to mind. He actually chuckles when he laughs. He lives life to the fullest and doesn't spend a lot of time pondering. Neecy's husband is the opposite. He is quiet, and thoughtful and takes the time to listen and ponder everything that is shared. But, they also share quite a few characteristics.

     Neecy's hubby and mine are dedicated to making sure that their wives are happy, fulfilled and treated with the ultimate of love and respect. They both love the Lord and seek to be the husbands, father and men that God desires them to be. They both get us. They understand what makes us tick and have the patience and understanding to know that Neecy and I have a crazy need to call each other at least 3 times a day to talk about whatever is important to us at the time. They know and respect that we have a standing date to watch Grey's Anatomy on Thursdays and that we'll call during the commercial breaks to 'discuss' the happenings. Both of us will pop popcorn and pour a glass of wine and even if the show isn't as exciting as we'd like it to be, we'll give our personal critiques and share our frustrations or observances. Our husbands know that although they are our BFF's, Neecy and I are, and always will be, 'besties.' We can talk about work, church, kids, friends, disappointments, fears and share goals and dreams. We will share memories and goofiness without fear of judgement. Both of our husbands knew that when they pledged their love they were in for the ride of their lives. They knew that Neecy and I were knitted together as a unique pair. They understood that together, Neecy and I are quirky, creative and unique in our own ways. Even though they are different, they are very much alike.
   
     In a short while they will finally meet for the first time. I'm nervous but anticipate that they will connect because through a weird sort of understanding, they know that Neecy and I are 'creative', 'special', and very 'unique' . They will share similar memories and experiences because Neecy and I dance to the beat of our own drums. No matter what, they will continue with their love and dedication because they understand the territory that comes along with being married to identical twins.

     Soon, Neecy and I will complete the twin puzzle. We will see each other and for whatever strange reason, we will embrace and continue as if we haven't been separated by time or distance. For a brief while, Neecy and I will be girls again. We will connect with giggles, junk food and silliness. If only for a short while, we will both feel complete.  Through pain, sadness and other challenges, we will discover each other and provide what we have both been longing for...time with a friend who knows us better than we know ourselves.

The Wind Beneath My Wings

     I'm worried. Even though I kicked the nailbiting habit years ago, I caught myself, chewing on my thumbnail. I've also had a problem sleeping. I fall asleep...then suddenly, wake up with a start. After tossing and turning for a bit and reading with a flashlight, I give up and usually end up on the couch in front of late night tv. It's a restless feeling that I can't explain. I'm worried about my twin, Neecy. She's been dealing with chest pains of an unknown cause for almost a year now. Without sounding crazy, I'm certain that I'm suffering from some kind of pseudo-sympathetic ailment. Today, my twin underwent a procedure to examine her esophagus. They inserted a tube down her throat to better determine the cause of her pain. I swear that this afternoon, I struggled with throat irritation. The day before that, I felt dull, chest pains. For the past year, I have felt a strong sense of heaviness, pulling on my chest. I know it sounds strange, but I feel my twin. I know that she's hurting and I hurt for her. I wish we could trade places but it's not that easy.

     She's my hero. Even though I've alway been the "strong, fiesty twin", she has always been someone that I admire and look up to. To see her brave and endure the pain is heartbreaking but at the same time, I admire her courage. I've always wanted to be a fairy godmother, granting wishes and dreams to encourage and give hope. But unfortunately, taking away my sister's pain is beyond my fairy-like ambitions. So, I pray. I pray for her and selfishly wish she was better so we could share crazy adventures again.

     I am reminded of a time, long ago when Neecy and I were about 9 years old. For some weird reason, I began to struggle with stomach aches of an unknown origin. I felt this constant lump in my throat and just felt sad all the time. Mom took me from one doctor to another. I endured all kinds of tests. I still remember swallowing the barium for the lower GI test. Whatever it was, I couldn't shake it. During this time, Neecy was lonely. She sat outside, waiting for me to come back to her. I slept a lot and just wanted to be left alone. Years later, I found out that I struggled with adolescent depression. The thing is, Neecy never gave up on me. She knew that in time, I would get better and return to my old self again.

     Ironically, it was Neecy that forced me out of my depression. I looked outside one day and realized that she was sitting on the curb all alone. My heart broke because I knew that she was just as sad as I was. It didn't happen overnight, but somehow I gained the courage to fight through the darkness. I was determined to be okay and with a lot of prayer and encouragement from my Neecy, I was.

     I think that's what I long for. I long to return the same favor. I long to take away Neecy's pain and to be there for her exactly as she was for me during that dark period. I long to be there with her during the sleepless night and the bouts of pain to comfort and reassure her that it's going to be alright. I long to sit up all night and watch oldie movies and chat the night away. I long to give her exactly what she has given me...unconditional love, support and the determination to keep fighting.
I realize I don't have the ability to make her pain go away but as long as I'm able I will always be there for her; even miles away. I want her to always remember that I am with her in spirit and that she is not alone in this fight.

     I'm not lying, I would love to shake a few doctors and demand that they "fix my Neecy" but I also realize that sitting in a jail cell would not be helpful to Neecy cause she would just worry about me.  So, I suck it up, put on a brave face and try to be the strong one. After all she is the wind beneath my wings. Do you have someone who has inspired you during a difficult time? I'd love to hear about it.

Big Girl Shoes



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     So, back to my story about ‘big girl shoes.’ I love shoes! Actually, I’m a late bloomer and just discovered that I have, for lack of a better definition, latent shoe passion. Simply meaning I’ve always secretly loved shoes but kept my passion at bay because I could never imagine myself wearing anything so glamorous, high or sexy. It all began when Neecy and I were little. We were born skinny, (scrawny, as Mom calls it) and bowlegged. Growing up, we heard all kinds of comments about the way we walked; funny and lopsided. It was nice having company in my bowlegged-ness. Anyway, because of the out-toeing, wearing shoes with even a slight heel was a challenge. I constantly had to remind myself, “Point your toes straight…” I really hadn’t paid much attention to shoes of the high-heeled variety until Hubby and I traveled to Vegas.

     Walking around the city, I noticed that a lot of women were wearing pumps, heels and wedges with no less than a 3 inch lift. After getting a tattoo I was feeling pretty empowered. So, I decided that the next item on my bucket list would be to dazzle high heeled shoes.

      As luck would have it, when we returned home, I discovered that a well-known shoe designer, Michael Antonio had set up shop in town. They were only open to the public one day a week. So, when Friday rolled around, I was on a mission. When I walked in, I saw a sea of beautiful shoes of every style, design and color. They were so cute! I started trying on shoes, cautious at first, and then I embraced this, ‘what the heck’ attitude and started trying on anything and everything in sight.

     Michael Antonio specializes in one-of-a-kind, uniquely styled shoes; mostly heels. Many of them were totally out of character for me but the more I tried on, the more excited I became. I completely lost track of time and before I realized it, I had selected 5 pairs of shoes. The shoes were a total faith purchase since I wasn’t sure I’d be able to stand, let alone walk in them. When I had tried them on, I was so giddy about how they looked in the mirror that I didn’t even attempt walking in them…(I know, not a bright idea.)

     When I got home, I couldn’t wait to show Hubby my shoes. I gushed, “Guess what I did, Babe? I got ‘big girl’ shoes.” One pair at a time, I showed them to him. Always supportive, my sweet Hubby shared in my enthusiasm because he realized what a big step this was for me. Speaking of step…When I finally got up the courage to walk around in my new shoes I decided to do what most beginners would do…take it really slow. I tried on a pair of boots first which wasn’t too bad. I was comfortable enough to walk several steps without biting it. I was feeling a bit over confident by the time I tried on the cute black stilettos. After the first faltering step, my foot tipped outward and I was about to hit the ground before Hubby saved me. I later learned from high heeled experts that practicing at home is the best thing to do before attempting to wear them in public.

     What I’ve learned through this experience is that shoes really do influence how you feel. I haven’t mastered the art of looking confident while I walk in them, but they do give me a boost in more ways than one. Since my last shoe shopping spree, Michael Antonio had a $10.00 shoe sample sale. I was SO excited and Hubby even went with me. This time, I walked out with 7 pairs of shoes.

     These days, my biggest problem isn’t walking without falling in my cute new shoes; it’s finding a way to make my closet bigger to accommodate my growing collection. Something tells me that the next item on my bucket list is going to be home remodeling. I think Hubby better hide the tools. What have you been up to lately? Oh, Michael Antonio is available for online purchases too. www.michaelantonio.com (Just in case you’re tempted.)

~Syrone

Tattoos, Hair Do's and Big Girl Shoes

     These past few months, I have taken some pretty big leaps. A friend of mine jokingly suggested that I might be going through a mid-life kind of thing.  Even though I’m nearing 50, (in 4 months), I’m certain that it’s not my age that’s prompting my quest for adventure. I kinda have a bucket list. I say ‘kinda’ because a ‘bucket list’ is usually a list of things you want to accomplish before you kick the bucket. But, my list is all about living the richest life possible without any regrets. I’m not in denial…I know that I will one day die, but I have a bunch of things I want to experience and enjoy while I’m still alive. So, I have a list although it’s not written down. It’s an open ended list, stored up in my head that is made up as I go along. Another cool thing is that my twin sis, Neecy is pursuing an adventure list of her own; which means I’m not alone in the craziness of it all.

     It all began with my desire to have a tattoo. I’d always said that I wanted one; nothing raunchy or crazy…something small, tasteful; a tribute to my sweetie of almost 29 years. Apparently, my hubby got tired of hearing me talk about getting a tattoo because when we traveled to Las Vegas several months ago, he decided to call my bluff. He took me for a drive which ended at the parking lot of Voodoo Tattoo. When I asked why we were stopping there. He answered casually, “You said you wanted a tattoo.” I quickly thought up a few excuses. “I’m not sure what I want. We don’t have time to wait. It might be too expensive.” He ignored me and led me to the front counter. I knew I couldn’t chicken out. So, I acted like I was totally fine with it.

     After I described what I wanted, (a simple Plumeria flower with my hubby’s name on it); the artist sketched it up and then led me to a lounge chair. I glanced around at the pictures covering the walls. There were skulls of every kind, butterflies, hearts, flowers and lightning bolts, colorful and very lifelike. Then I really got nervous.  The tat artist told me to let him know if it was too painful or if I needed a break. I took a deep breath and sunk into the lounge chair with my eyes closed while he slowly etched (more like scraped) a design on my ankle. I’m not gonna lie, it did hurt…just a little but I sucked it up and kept a grin on my face. When he was finished, I was totally thrilled, not only did it look awesome but, I’d survived. It was such a rush! I had accomplished the very first thing on my list. My hubby was amazed that I went through with it. I was so proud of myself for sticking it out. These days, my mantra is, ‘Just suck it up and do it!’ Or, translated another way, “Feel the fear and do it anyway.”

 

 

     I was on such a high after getting my tattoo that I felt almost invincible. I was ready to zip line, or do something really daring. Fortunately for me, my cousin, Tricia is a wonderful hairstylist in Las Vegas. I met up with her and told her I wanted to do something different; something totally out of character. So, she worked her magic and created a look that made me do a double take when I saw myself. My hubby loved it!  I’d changed my hair color and my look. I looked, well…sassy. That night, when we went out with hubby’s bowling buds, they were patting him on the back and one commented, “Man, I’m going to tell your wife that you’re cheating on her.”  I felt flattered to have gained the approval of his guy friends.

 

     Later that night, I started noticing how so many women in Las Vegas were walking around in these beautiful, high heeled, stiletto type of shoes. I was in awe because as high as the shoes were, (3 – 5 inches) they didn’t appear to be in pain. They walked around with confidence. It was then that I decided that the next item on my list was going to be to learn how to wear “big girl” shoes. (When my sis and I were little we called shoes with any type of heel, “big girl” shoes.) So, I announced to Hubby that I was going to master the art of wearing heels. Of course he got this big grin on his face because like most guys, he seems to think it’s sexy for a woman to wear high heeled shoes. Thus began my next quest…big girl shoes. Next time, I will tell you about my adventures in shoe shopping and my next goal of walking around with high heeled shoes. Until then...

Syrone~

 

 

I Digress!!!

I've always wanted to use the line, 'I digress' but never had a good reason to use it until now.  When I noted the date of my last post, I have to admit that I was pretty embarrassed.  Where has time gone?  I thought about taking the chicken way out and offering all kinds of excuses but honestly...I don't have one except that I've just been so caught up in this fast-paced journey of life that I've hardly taken time to do the things that I really love.

After such a long hiatus, I've come to realize a few things.  One, I need accountability partners to keep me on the blogger straight and narrow.  (I have avoidance and procrastination issues.) The second thing I've discovered is that blogging is all about sharing creatively from your heart.   I tend to over think the whole blogging thing and end up becoming my own worse critic. So, I solemly promise to take the leap no matter how intimidated I may feel. (You all are a tough group to follow.) I'll make every effort to peek my head out now and again. Especially now...as we're nearing a wonderful jazz festival season.

So, bear with me...

Writing and All that Jazz...Take Two!!

...All That Jazz

Here is where ...All That Jazz comes into the picture. I totally love jazz, especially smooth jazz.  I've come to realize that jazz covers every mood, emotion and situation.  Not only that but it goes well with just about everything. Back in March, Hubby and I went to Sonoma, California (better known as Wine Country) for a barrel tasting and food pairing event. It was amazing.  I promise to tell more about our Wine Country trip in a future post.  I brought this topic up because while we were there, we had the thrill of tasting foods, elaborately paired with the "perfect" wine selection. Alone, the food was wonderful and quite tasty but paired with the wine, each and every morsel was outstanding!

So it is with jazz music. Jazz is a music style that pairs well with just about anything. It offers a sound that is crisp, deep, electrifying and totally soul stirring.  When I was younger, I was never able to "get" jazz.  I mean, it had a great sound, but I didn't have a desire to keep listening to it. My first connection to jazz music came in the form of a high school crush.  Music Store Boy worked behind the counter.  He was cute and not only that, he had musical knowledge.  He was always talking about "my man, Grover."  I had no idea who Grover was, until he gave me a listen.  That was my first intro to jazz music icon, Grover Washington. It wasn't bad, but it still wasn't my time to really enjoy jazz. (By the way, Music Store Boy ended up being a pot smoking jerk, although he did have great taste in music.)

Years later, I heard Kenny G. and fell totally in love with his sound.  I wore out every Kenny G. album and cd I could get my hands on.  I still wasn't totally into jazz but I did enjoy Kenny G.

Then, I was introduced to the music styling of Boney James and shortly after that, a slew of other amazing artists.  That was all it took.  I landed a writing gig covering jazz festivals in Southern California and had the privilege of hearing performers I never even knew existed.  I learned to appreciate other instruments as well, but the sax became my number one fave.

There's something indescribable about sitting in an arena, concert hall, park...wherever, surrounded by the cool, jams of jazz.  At that moment, no matter what type of chaos might be going on in life, it simply fades away to be replaced by what can best be described as a feeling of floating.  It's as if you're really feeling the heart of the music.  It's mesmerizing. I've decided to feature a jazz artist each week along with some amazing photos. I won't tell you who will be my first feature artist, but I will give you a little hint...When I listen to this artist, I can't sit still. More soon!